from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Randomize
