In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize