i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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