ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
