soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
