Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
