you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
