We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
