My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
How does one acquire holy water?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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