i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Randomize
