I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Fuck appropriateness.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I'm just crazy horny about you
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
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