yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
she pinky promised me she was 18
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
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