my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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