New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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