That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
