I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
