I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
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