There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
This toilet bowl is my home.
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