Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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