we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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