If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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