his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
