The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
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