dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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