Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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