Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
