been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
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