Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize