Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
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