If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
