I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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