I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
You are the jesus of drinking
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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