I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Randomize
