I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize