Having a random hookup so left but love u
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
