i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
