I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize