I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
