Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Randomize
