So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
not ubering you a puppy
Randomize
