he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
