oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
