Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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