I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
