He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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