i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
