Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
