i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
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