that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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