oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
she was so not down for the gang bang
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Randomize
