I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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