I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Randomize
